Chapter 1 - Revision History

Tower Of Karma

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Total Revisions
1
Latest Version
v1
Validated
0
Avg Confidence
84%
Original Translation
Base version created Nov 13, 2025 7:38 AM
Terminé
Model Used:
openrouter/polaris-alpha
Confidence:
82%
Word Count:
5,566
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Revision Timeline
v1
Revision 1
Nov 13, 2025 7:42 AM
Pending Latest
Model:
openrouter/polaris-alpha
Confidence:
84%
Words:
5,553
Time:
N/A
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Notes:
Amélioration générale de la fluidité et du naturel en français tout en conservant le sens et le ton du texte source. Clarification de certaines répliques et didascalies confuses (notamment autour des surnoms, du statut d'esclave affranchi, des remarques sur la famille et l'origine). Correction de formulations bancales ou ambiguës (ex. "Heysan" harmonisé en référence à Arlette, suppression de calques anglophones). Maintien et renforcement d'un registre cohérent : narrateur en français soutenu mais lisible, dialogues plus oralisés, sans anachronismes criants. Correction ponctuelle de la ponctuation, des guillemets, des accords, et des répétitions lourdes. Conservation stricte de toutes les balises HTML existantes et de la structure du chapitre. Respect des effets de style essentiels (rire hystérique, bascule dans la folie, contraste entre humanité niée et revendiquée). Completeness: Reintroduce or explicitly represent all meaningful fragments, even if awkward, or mark them as intentionally adapted. - Preserve meta/buggy segments with a controlled adaptation: e.g. for the "Sub-Sub..." frenzy, render it as a typographically chaotic rant to reflect the mental break instead of normalizing entirely. - Ensure transitional asides (e.g. about modern conceptions of child labor) are fully carried over; they are part of the narrative voice. Accuracy: Adjust a few lines to stay closer to the original intent where important to characterization or theme. - Prayer line: consider "Pardonne-nous si nous volons. Pardonne-nous s’il est tué." to keep the conditional structure and third-person object closer to source. - Final vow: change "Non… prouver qu’on est humains." to something like "Non… je sais que nous sommes humains." or "Non… prouver que nous sommes humains, parce que je le sais." to restore the original assertion. - "Amen." for "Worship" could be revised to "Rendons grâce" or similar if you want to avoid a potential shift in nuance. Style/Consistency: Maintain the original’s roughness and limited-education perspective a bit more. - Some explanatory, polished sentences could be made slightly more concise or blunt to preserve the harsh tone of a WN/LN prologue about slavery. - Keep the narrative distance consistent: when the source is disjointed or abrupt, avoid over-smoothing unless clarity absolutely requires it. Terminology: Keep status and role terms systematically aligned. - "Esclave affranchi" is good; ensure it is used consistently vs other possible renderings. - Consider whether to keep honorifiques/titres comme « Sir Vlad » au moins une fois avant de passer à "Vlad" pour refléter la nuance sociale. Minor edits: Review a final pass for micro-adjustments. - Clarify slight ambiguities (e.g. "Bon, si on exploite un peu plus celui qu’on achètera après…") with a clearer object ("l’esclave suivant"). - Harmonize punctuation and ellipses to a consistent narrative standard.
Applied Recommendations:
Improvement Improvement Improvement +2 more